It’s been a common theme for a lot of people to pick a word or phrase to focus on in the New Year. Admittedly, I’ve tried to jump on the bandwagon in the past, but flamed out with my goals and intentions probably sometime around February.
With that said, I will go ahead and try again because that is truly one of the great things about being alive-there is always another chance to better yourself!
After much thought and meditation on this subject, I think I’ve finally decided that in 2020 I’m going to Lead with Love. If that sounds a little vague, that is my intention and I think the point of this exercise in general. You really need to be able to work with your word or phrase in each situation, which I think mine does.
This past year I’ve been on this journey of, as cheesy as it sounds, self-discovery. I’ve really looked hard at a lot of aspects of my life and realized that in many instances I was repeating patterns and being inflexible in different areas of my life. There has also been a lack of compassion for others on my part, which is something I’ve struggled with for a long time.
Somewhere along the way I found my heart hardening towards others in ways that I didn’t even recognize. When I was younger, someone close to me got into an accident and was laid up for a long time that resulted in many years of chronic pain which was followed by many minor illnesses and complaints. Even though this situation should have made me more compassionate, I think it made that part of me harden up and see weakness in the struggle instead of being empathetic.
This lack of compassion has been something I’ve struggled with in every aspect of my life, though I do think that I can be empathic when it comes to pain that is not physical. Even now, I find myself repulsed by physical weakness in many forms that I didn’t even realize until I started looking deeper into why I wasn’t getting along with people. In short, I felt I needed to focus on love instead of following my regular pattern of dismissive actions and judgment.
Revealing this about myself is tough, because I’ve started to shine light on my own weaknesses and looking into the reason I’ve been attracting certain things into my life. I think that having a motto of Lead with Love for the next year will give me a mantra to hold onto and really it can’t hurt to put more love out in the Universe.
In various moments in the past couple of months I’ve had people tell me that they like to be around me because I make them feel good. Having high vibrations and putting off good energy is crazy addictive and I want to do that for people! I want to be a beacon of light and help others raise their vibrations just by being around me. It’s not always easy, but I’m working at it every single day.
2020 will be the year I get my energy right and accomplish big things. I think one of the first things I need to do is put aside my fears about putting myself out there. I thought that blogging would give me incentive to set some goals and really go after them, but honestly, life has gotten in the way and my goals shifted. When that happened I was afraid to admit defeat on a platform where I had declared my promises to myself. So, instead of going after what I wanted, I fell into a shadow of self-doubt and uncertainty. It seems silly to even admit that since this blog is so young and new, but in order to be completely transparent I feel like I should go ahead and lay it all out on the line.
With that said, the format of this blog may change from goal-oriented to more personal development as a way for me to log my journey and share that with others. There will probably be some other random topics sprinkled in, but for the foreseeable future I think I’ll just see where it all takes me. I’m still setting goals and going after them, but that will not be the only focus going forward.
If there is anyone out there, then I’d love to hear from you!